With all of the accusations in Hollywood coming to light and the women’s movement being in the headlines many social media talking heads are revisiting topics with opinions that some may or may not find offensive. These days, as a man, I just listen and observe. Often times the male perspective is either not wanted or misinterpreted so it’s best not to go there. But it is kind of interesting to see what women let other women get away with saying. Such is the case with Kevin Hart immitator and Instagram Comedian Jess Hilarious. She feels that women should report rape “No matter what” as if it’s just that simple and they don’t do so because they forget to get around to it.

Now don’t get me wrong, I understand what she is TRYING to say. But many men have TRIED to say this as well and had their careers and reputations ruined in doing so. So many, in fact, that I’m surprised anyone feels comfortable saying this.

I do get that comedy can be used to break the tension of a serious subject, but some subjects deserve to be addressed directly and without misinterpretation.

Rape should definitely be reported immediately, but a woman should NOT be shamed if she is unable to, or hesitates for a moment. I feel like comedians shouldn’t speak as rape counselors or as any authority on what a victim should do, would do, and is required to do after a rape. Depending on the circumstances she could be too traumatized to speak. She could be embarrassed {Even though she has no reason to be}. And she could be scared of her attacker further victimizing her. There’s so many things that could be going through a woman’s mind after such a traumatic incident. And the psychological effects  And let’s not forget that black victims are rarely shown the compassion our white counterparts are shown.

So while I love a message that promotes women speaking up for themselves after violent attacks I think it’s important we don’t start shaming women who can’t immediately find the words. Anyone can speak boldly about what they WOULD do in a situation….until they’re in that situation. We move into very dangerous territory when we start assuming we can predict what state of mind a victim will be in and how rational their thought process will be. 

All we can do is MAKE it easier for them to come forward and how they do.

Qool Hive do you think her comments empowered or shamed?

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